Monday, March 26, 2007

ATM Machines

MALE VS.  FEMALE AT THE ATM MACHINE

A  new sign in the Bank Lobby reads:

Please note that this Bank is installing new Drive-through ATM
machines  enabling customers to withdraw  cash without leaving  their
vehicles.

Customers   using this new facility are requested to use the procedures
outlined
below when  accessing their accounts."

"After  months of careful research, MALE &FEMALE Procedures have been
developed.
Please  follow the Appropriate steps for your gender."

MALE PROCEDURE:

  1.   Drive up to the cash machine.
  2.   Put down your car window.
  3.   Insert card into machine and enter PIN.
  4.   Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.
  5.   Retrieve card, cash and receipt.
  6.   Put window up.
  7.   Drive off.

>                **********************************************

FEMALE  PROCEDURE:

Unfortunately,   most of  this part is the  Truth.!!!!

1.   Drive  up to cash machine.
2.   Reverse and back up the required amount to align car window with the machine.
3.   Set parking brake, put the window down.
4.   Find handbag, remove all contents on to  passenger seat to locate card.
5.   Tell person on cell phone you will call  them back and hang up.
6.   Attempt  to insert card into machine.
7.   Open car door to allow easier access to  machine due to its excessive distance from the car.
8.   Insert card.
9.   Re-insert card the right way.
10. Dig  through handbag to find diary; with your PIN written on the inside back page.
11. Enter PIN
12. Press  cancel and re-enter correct PIN.
13. Enter  amount of cash required.
14. Check  makeup in rear view mirror.
15. Retrieve  cash and receipt.
16. Empty  handbag again to locate wallet  and place cash inside.
17. Write  debit amount in check  register  and  place receipt in back of checkbook.
18. Re-check  makeup.
19. Drive  forward 2 feet.
20. Reverse  back to cash machine.
21. Retrieve card.
22. Re-empty  hand bag, locate cardholder,  and place card into the slot provided!
23. Give  dirty look to irate male driver; waiting  behind you.
24. Restart  stalled engine and pull off.
25. Redial  person on cell phone.
26. Drive  for 2 to 3 miles.
27. Release  Parking Brake.


Don't get soaked. Take a quick peek at the forecast
with theYahoo! Search weather shortcut.

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